I Got a Seat and Potentially a Cold

I got a seat today! I got on the train and there happened to be a middle seat open between two older men. I ask the guy on the aisle if I could sit down. He agrees, gets up and lets me in. Now, you’d think I’d be excited…WRONG!

No sooner than I sit down, do these two guys have flemmy coughing fits! I figure they will stop soon. NOPE! One reaches in his pocket for a cough drop and pops it in his mouth. Do you think that stopped the fit? NO! I hold my breath but I quickly realize that this will go on longer than I can possibly hold my breath.

I wrap my scarf around my face and try very hard not to need oxygen for the remainder of the train ride as these two have a coughing standoff with me in the middle!

I’ll be chugging orange juice and Beracca like it’s my job today!

That is all!

Oh MBTA- Get it together...

Oh MBTA…Get it together!

Last night, I walked to North Station. I figured it was a safer bet than taking the Orange line. Once I got there, I was prepared to take the 5:40pm train home and was prepared for delays thrown at me as well. I was on the phone with a friend when I heard over the loud speaker that a 5:30pm express train was making ALL the stops which included mine! Yippee! I quickly hung up with my friend and B- Lined it to the train.

I quickly realized that was everyone else’s plan too. It was standing room only. Sardine packed on the commuter rail! Squished! People were standing everywhere.

We are then crawling out of North Station. I couldn’t even believe how packed it was. The conductor comes over the loud speaker telling us that even though it ‘s a packed train, there are only two…TWO conductors on the train and therefore two…ONLY TWO doors will open!

I am in the MIDDLE OF THE TRAIN! No matter which way I go, I have to climb through the masses.

I am irritated and happy at the same time! I am on the train! YAY! I will have to crowd surf to get out of here! Not Yay!

A guy near me pulls out a pack of peanuts. I can smell them. I don’t want them. In fact I am allergic to peanuts (Although, I eat Reeses cups because they are worth the pain! HA!) BUT Just to have some fun and to see what I could get away with, I tell the guy I am severely allergic to peanuts and he needs to put them away since it is so packed I don’t think medical attention could get to me before I die! Hey… I have to entertain myself somehow right?!

He apologizes and puts them away quickly. I say a quick thank you and we are done.  However, the women next to me hear me and start talking about how it’s a rule at school that their kids can’t bring peanut butter and jelly sandwiches because of a sever allergy and they never thought of it on the train…blah blah blah.

Anyway, plotting my escape from the sardine packed train, I am the third stop and hope that people get off before me to make my trek to the door a little more pleasant.

NOPE! Not the case! At the stop prior to mine, a small group of us start making our way to the door. I felt like I was in a mosh pit…remember those?...are they still around?... when you are 29 (again), you may start to date yourself. Any who… the train is jostling back and forth and I am bumping in to people that perhaps in real life…like real-real life and not on a train, I wouldn’t want to bump into!  Not even in a mosh pit!

I finally get to my stop and am off the train. I am home by 6:45pm. Not too bad. I check my emails and find that trains after me were delayed between 50 minutes to 2 hours. Even though my ride was tight, I made it home and that’s better than waiting 2 hours!

Thoughts of an MBTA Rider

6:45am- I am so early this morning. I will catch the early train in and avoid delays because it’s the early train, it’s on a fresh track and no one else will have this idea… no they won’t!

7ish am (I am not looking at phone or watch- too cold for this sh*t)- The train is here! I am so excited. I was right! I will make it to work on time!

7:03-ish am- Train stops, opens doors lets people off and says they aren’t taking any more passengers because of “heavy ridership” . We are informed a train is on its way.

7:04ish am- RIOT!! Yup! Hundreds of people on the platform are ready to flip the f*ck out!

7:05ish am- Do you wait for the train to come? Do you go home and warm up and come back?

7:06ish am- Check phone. Several emails indicate that the “train that’s on its way” is delayed 15, nope 20 nope 30 minutes, nope… the emails keep going.

7:07am- Go home and warm up.

7:10am- Dog is THRILLED that you are home from work so early! My, what a quick day that was.

7:30am- Head to train station in hopes that you can get to the front of the platform to be guaranteed to board.

7:31am- Dog devastated by your departure…again!

7:33am- Arrive at the station to realize it’s not coming for 21 more minutes…that’s an estimate as I later find out that it was not 21 minutes.

Wait and wait and wait.

7:50am- See train off in the distance. It’s not slowing down. Oh sh*t! That’s the express train! I am in the front for ideal boarding for the next train but it’s not ideal for the express train. Turn back just in time for ice chunks to be sprayed all over my back, legs and stuck in my hair!

7:51am- Attempt to remove all ice chunks.

7:55am- Permanent chill sets in. Now shivering even though fully prepared for the cold.

7:55am-8:15am- have to listen to awkward small talk conversations going on everywhere. Luckily, I am not in one of them.

8:15am- Train finally arrives. Board smoothly. Train is packed and I will take the first open seat.

8:16am- “Can I sit down?” I ask. “No, the ceiling is leaking on the middle seat.”  I Didn’t verify this. However, not taking chances with my chill that has set in. I went to next available seat.

8:20am- Sitting next to woman with “working girl look”. (Sneakers, tights and slouchy socks). It’s not the 80’s anymore lady! Get over that look!

8:25am- Shoot! I drank my coffee and never thought to pee before leaving the house for a second time. Damn! Was too concerned about disappointing the dog for a second time today.

8:50am- Arrive at North Station and B-Line it to the ladies room. There is no way I am getting stuck on the T while needing to pee!

9am- Get to T platform. Homeless woman with 2 coolie carts and a cheetah print blanky over her, is heckling the riders. 3 MBTA police step in and try to remove her but she technically isn’t doing anything wrong so they let her stay and remain close by in case she decides to go batsh*t crazy.

9:04am- The T arrives. We pile in. I am squished in so tightly that I don’t need to worry about holding on!

9:05am- We arrive at Haymarket. ONE woman needs to get off. ONE! Everyone piles out on to the platform, everyone piles back on. She isn’t happy with the amount of space given to her to get off the train and she starts screaming “LET ME OFF ALREADY” even though she was in fact off the train!

9:07am- State Street! AH! My stop! I am so packed in that it is nearly impossible to get off the train. I maintain my composure and finally I am freed to get off the train.

9:08am- Walk up the stairs to the street in the herd of sheeple and walk to my office.

Now, let’s see about getting home…