Karma…That B*tch!

 This morning I get to the train station, pay the parking machine and walk up to the train platform. The outbound train comes in and prevents us stragglers from crossing to the inbound platform. As I wait, I notice the dumb a*s douche bag that thought the parking lot was the autobahn the other day. I look at her outfit up and down. OK I do that to everyone! I like my fashion and like to see what people are wearing. If they are wearing something nice, I compliment them and mean it. If they aren’t, I blog about it… like camel toe faux pas and how spandex isn’t for everyone.

Anyway…while I am taking in her outfit I notice that her jeans are split at the seam. Do I tell her? Do I not? I go back and forth on that for a second and then I just blurt it out.

“I hate to ruin in your morning but your jeans are split at the seam.” I whisper to her as I point to the culprit area.

She gasps and doesn’t know what to do. Does she cross and go to work in split seamed jeans or does she go home and change? She went home and changed without even saying a word to me…which is fair because the day she cut me off, I didn’t say a word to her. I just gave her the death look.

Trying to be Nice. Karma is a B*tch.

Friday on my way home, I went down to State to hop on the Orange line to North Station. I noticed these two older women with luggage that looked lost. They found a map of the T and were chatting back and forth about which way they should go and how they weren’t sure. I know how if feels to be lost in an unfamiliar subway so as I walked by I said “Where do you ladies need to go?” they stared at me blankly. I knew it wasn’t a language barrier because I just over heard them speak English! “I can try to point you in the right direction if you’d like.” I say thinking that if I rephrase it, maybe they will comprehend that I’m just trying to be nice so they don’t have to be lost. The two of them just stare at me. However, this time with evil eyes. What? Am I supposed to be afraid? You have evil eyes… I have pepper spray. Just sayin’.  

 I start to walk away and one goes to the other “Looking at the map, we should be able to get to North Station by going this way.” Since I was going to North Station myself, I figured they’d be right behind me. I turned around to see where they were heading. NOPE! They trotted off toward the wrong platform and ya know what? If I try to help you twice and I full well know you’re heading in the wrong direction after I tried to help… good luck to you and may you realize you’re heading in the wrong direction at the least opportune time, may you get off in the ghetto and may you miss your connecting train at North Station. Karma is a b*ch ladies isn’t it?