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Friday, July 22, 2016

I'll Just Pick Up My Dignity Now

Last night, I am walking to the train and enter the train station when I realize it is 5:14. My train leaves at 5:15pm. I pick up the pace and start off toward the track. I am talking on my phone. I have my ear bud in (only one ear! Never two. I always need to hear my surroundings too). My purse is a hand bag with an attachable cross body strap for when my hands are full and… I had my hands full. I was carrying my cake carrier from an office birthday that was empty (thankfully) in one hand and a seltzer in the other.

Anyway, I have my phone stashed in my purse as I gab away and hustle for the train. I reach the platform and it looks like the conductor is still letting people on. As soon as I hit the platform, my cross body strap unhooks and the contents of my purse go everywhere as my purse falls to the ground and rips my ear bud out of my ear. My phone, had it not been attached to the ear buds and the ear buds somehow wrapped around my feet now, would have gone flying into the tracks. I start screaming at my rouge phone “JUST A MINUTE!!” The call dropped anyways but the conductor thought I was yelling at him like “Oh, Just a minute! Hold the train while I just pick up the contents of my purse…oh and my dignity as everyone watches after they have all gasped! The conductor screams back “OK but hurry up!”

I pick up everything and enter the train with my purse, seltzer, cake carrier, make up, phone, ear buds…everything rolled up in some sort of ball that is miraculously staying together while I try to find a seat. The last thing I want to do is request a middle seat because my ball of belongings would go rouge again. I find a B*TCH with her bag on the outside seat of a 2 seater. I nicely request her to move the bags so I can sit. She pretends she can’t hear me so I request again. She huffs and moves the bags. (PS! There is a special place in hell for people who put their bags on the seat during rush hour and actually think they will have the seat to themselves the entire way!)

I sit down and try to put back the contents of my purse and hope…hope hope… that I have everything! I do! PHEW! But it was all sprinkled with seltzer now! Small price to pay for making the train I suppose!!

ANNDD Now it’s Friday so yay for that!!!

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