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Friday, January 20, 2012

New Englanders need 1 of 2 things! Trusty Vehicle or Balls!

If you live in New England you need one of two things.  Either A.) A vehicle that can get through the snow properly or B.) The balls to get your “not-made-for-snow” vehicle through the snow properly! Take your pick but you need one of those two. For instance, I have an SUV. This chick is not getting stuck in a ditch any time soon! However, when you have a vehicle made to get through the snow and you are stuck behind someone that doesn’t obtain either of the two things required for a New Englander, it isn’t helpful!!

 This morning I was stuck behind a tiny little thing of a car. I could have fit it in the trunk of my SUV. This person was driving 10 mph. 10! We only got about an inch and a half of snow. Come on you pussy, drive! This morning, my fianc√© kissed me good bye and said “Be sure to give yourself extra time. It snowed last night.” I though to myself “Whatever, I can just plow through this sprinkling no problem.” What I failed to realize was that others couldn’t just plow through it with no problem!

I was stuck behind this person in the rinky dink car the entire way to the train station. I literally pulled into the parking lot, parked wherever I could, locked the doors and ran! The train was already at the station. I ran through the parking lot in all the slush not even caring that it was splashing all over me. My coffee went everywhere… it was shaken, no longer stirred by the time I got to the platform. I ran up two flights of stairs, over the overpass and down two flights of stairs. By the time I got to the bottom, I was shocked that the doors were still open. I jumped on the train and sat down.

While getting situated, the train shut the doors and takes off. At that very moment I realize, I never put the E-break on! Oh…My…GOD!!! Really… the train is taking off and I don’t know if my vehicle is rolling around the parking lot! I am just praying I left it in first gear!

Meanwhile, I feel a slight burn on my leg. I look down and the slush I had run through in the parking lot had plenty of salt in it. If you have ever seen an overly salted area, it would be the train station. It is as if a gravel truck came and dumped a load of gravel and they spread it out. The MBTA is taking no chances when it comes to slip and falls. Well, that salt ended up on my leg. It’s burning like crazy. I try to wipe it off with my gloved hand but to no avail, the salt is stuck to my nylons. I don’t have any wipes… OK, OK, I had a wipe. However, it was a feminine wipe in my purse and there was no way in hell I was whipping that out of my purse on a train full of men. My leg could burn off before I waved that thing around.

By continually pulling my nylons and letting go, the slush-slash-salt mixture dried and stopped burning. Thank goodness. By the time I got to North Station, my leg was fine. However, this would have never happened if the driver of the rinky dink car had balls and I’d like to point out that said driver of rinky dink car that had no balls did NOT make the train! Nope! She didn’t have the balls to run through the slush either! It serves her right for being a wimp. So there!

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